Doing Not A Thing.

Word of the Day

2006-08-08T13:23:00.000-04:00

flum·mox
(flum·moxed, flum·mox·ing, flum·mox·es)
To confuse; perplex.

OMG

2006-08-06T20:47:00.000-04:00

Colbert smackdown

2006-07-26T16:04:00.000-04:00

Eat shit Matt Lauer - You just got served ... By Stephen Colbert.

Thanks to In The Back Of A ... for the video.

UPDATE: Reinventing the wheel

2006-07-23T20:40:00.000-04:00

It’s time for a rethinking of our purpose in an attempt to ensure that the bands we selected really did have at least one great album after ’94.

So, please, revote on all the bands on the VOTING BLOC – this time say which album you liked and why it deserves to be up here. Also, any bands on the BIG LIST that you feel should be voted upon, say so.

WARNING: I'm not interested, as commenter Boobs saw as a negative point, if an artist has proven themselves. If they haven't fine. It only takes one (1) great album to be up here. Remember the critera: 1) The band released one (1) great album since Dec. 31, 1993; and 2) The album in question be of markedly different material than the music released by the artist in question before 1994.

BIG LIST:
Radiohead / Green Day / The Strokes / The White Stripes / Dave Matthews Band / Death Cab For Cutie / Kanye West / No Doubt / Tool / Rage Against The Machine / Red Hot Chili Peppers / The Neptunes / Johnny Cash / Notorious B.I.G. / Tupac Shakur / Dr. Dre / Beastie Boys / Jay-Z / Oasis / Wu-Tang Clan / Nirvana / Coldplay / The Smashing Pumpkins / Blackstar / Sublime / John Mayer The Shins / Weezer / Beck / Jack Johnson / Franz Ferdinand / Ben Harper / Pearl Jam / Counting Crows / Foo Fighters / System Of A Down / Common / Phish / Norah Jones / Audioslave / Ben Folds / Jet / Alanis Morissette / Fugees / Outkast / Ryan Adams / The Flaming Lips / Bruce Springstein / Nas / The Roots / Eminem / Gorillaz / Ben Harper / Paul McCartney / Cake /

VOTING BLOC:
Hootie & The Blowfish / Blues Traveler / Liz Phair / Fiona Apple / Taking Back Sunday / Brand New / R. Kelly / Danger Mouse / Spoon / Stone Temple Pilots / Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! / Guster / Jamiroquai / Bush / Snoop Dogg / Dispatch / Bjork / Seu Jorge / The Walkmen / Artic Monkeys / Modest Mouse / The Postal Service / Sufjan Stevens / Cat Power / My Morning Jacket / Iron & Wine / Bloc Party / blink182 / Jada Kiss / Justin Timberlake / The Cranberries / Robert Randolph & The Family Band / 311 / Rilo Kiley / Bright Eyes / Garbage / Massive Attack / Air / Underworld / Korn / Nine Inch Nails / Alice in Chains / The Mars Volta /

OUT:
Christina Aguilera / My Chemical Romance / Clipse / David Gray / Air / Interpol / Bone Thugs n' Harmony / Sigor Ros / The Yeah Yeah Yeahs /

Christopher Reeve was an idiot and a quitter

2006-07-23T20:36:00.000-04:00

ISU to remove papers with 'Dummies' headline
June 30, 2006

The campus newspaper for Iowa State University students is removing a special section printed in advance of the Special Olympics that contained the words, "Ames for Dummies," on an events listings page.
Mark Witherspoon, editorial advisor to the Iowa State Daily, said 1,500 special sections about the Special Olympics will be reprinted with a new headline.
He also said Iowa State Daily Thursday editions that are on campus this afternoon with the headline "Ames for Dummies", will be pulled.
The Special Olympics in Ames will be the first national event for the competition that features people with intellectual disabilities. Organizers have said a major goal of the event is to dispel stereotypes and improve treatment for people with intellectual disabilities.

New Voting Bloc + Brand New; Updated list

2006-07-21T10:34:00.000-04:00

BIG LIST:
Radiohead / Green Day / The Strokes / The White Stripes / Dave Matthews Band / Death Cab For Cutie / The Postal Service / Sufjan Stevens / Kanye West / No Doubt / Tool / Rage Against The Machine / Red Hot Chili Peppers / Robert Randolph & The Family Band / The Neptunes / Johnny Cash / Notorious B.I.G. / Tupac Shakur / Dr. Dre / Beastie Boys / Jay-Z / Bjork / Oasis / Garbage / Wu-Tang Clan / Nirvana / Coldplay / The Smashing Pumpkins / Blackstar / Sublime / Justin Timberlake / John Mayer / blink182 / The Shins / Modest Mouse / Weezer / Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! / Beck / The Mars Volta / Jack Johnson / Franz Ferdinand / Jamiroquai / Ben Harper / Pearl Jam / Counting Crows / Foo Fighters / System Of A Down / Common / Phish / My Morning Jacket / Cake / Iron & Wine / Norah Jones / Audioslave / Ben Folds / Jet / Seu Jorge / The Walkmen / Artic Monkeys / Alanis Morissette / Fugees / Outkast / The Cranberries / Ryan Adams / The Flaming Lips / Bruce Springstein / Bloc Party / Snoop Dogg / Dispatch / Guster / Nas / The Roots / Eminem / Rilo Kiley / Gorillaz / Ben Harper / Bush / Bright Eyes / 311 / Paul McCartney / Hootie & The Blowfish /

VOTING BLOC:
Blues Traveler, Liz Phair, Fiona Apple, Taking Back Sunday, Brand New, R. Kelly, Danger Mouse (Grey Album), Spoon, Sigor Ros, The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Bone Thugs n' Harmony

OUT:
Christina Aguilera, My Chemical Romance, Clipse, David Gray, Air, Interpol

Staged, yet sweet

2006-07-20T18:25:00.000-04:00

I love Jim Rome. Check him getting nearly knocked out here.

UPDATE V. 2.0

2006-07-20T13:11:00.000-04:00

My Apologies: The part about a change in their sound was intended to mean a change in that bands sound. So, any artist that debuted since then automatically qualifies. The point was to exclude artists like Bob Marley (for Legends) and The Beatles (for One).

Radiohead / Green Day / The Strokes / The White Stripes / Dave Matthews Band / Death Cab For Cutie / The Postal Service / Sufjan Stevens / Kanye West / No Doubt / Tool / Rage Against The Machine / Red Hot Chili Peppers / Robert Randolph & The Family Band / The Neptunes / Johnny Cash / Notorious B.I.G. / Tupac Shakur / Dr. Dre / Beastie Boys / Jay-Z / Bjork / Oasis / Garbage / Wu-Tang Clan / Nirvana / Coldplay / The Smashing Pumpkins / Blackstar / Sublime / Justin Timberlake / John Mayer / blink182 / The Shins / Modest Mouse / Weezer / Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! / Beck / The Mars Volta / Jack Johnson / Franz Ferdinand / Jamiroquai / Ben Harper / Pearl Jam / Counting Crows / Foo Fighters / System Of A Down / Common / Phish / My Morning Jacket / Cake / Iron & Wine / Norah Jones / Audioslave / Ben Folds / Jet / Seu Jorge / The Walkmen / Artic Monkeys / Alanis Morissette / Fugees / Outkast / The Cranberries / Ryan Adams / The Flaming Lips / Bruce Springstein / Bloc Party / Snoop Dogg / Dispatch / Guster / Nas / The Roots / Eminem / Rilo Kiley / Danger Mouse / Ben Harper / Bush /

On the question board, support or deny these:
Interpol, Bright Eyes, Brand New, Hootie & The Blowfish, Paul McCartney, Blues Traveler, Air, Liz Phair, 311, Fiona Apple, Taking Back Sunday, Brand New

Out: Christina Aguilera, Gorillaz, My Chemical Romance, Clipse, David Gray

UPDATE

2006-07-19T21:53:00.000-04:00

New leaderboard:
Radiohead / Green Day / The Strokes / The White Stripes / Dave Matthews Band / Death Cab For Cutie / The Postal Service / Sufjan Stevens / Kanye West / No Doubt / Tool / Rage Against The Machine / Red Hot Chili Peppers / Robert Randolph & The Family Band / The Neptunes / Johnny Cash / Notorious B.I.G. / Tupac Shakur / Dr. Dre / Beastie Boys / Jay-Z / Bjork / Oasis / Garbage / Wu-Tang Clan / Nirvana / Coldplay / The Smashing Pumpkins / Blackstar / Sublime / Justin Timberlake / John Mayer / blink182 / The Shins / Modest Mouse / Weezer / Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! / Beck / The Mars Volta / Jack Johnson / Franz Ferdinand / Jamiroquai / Ben Harper / Pearl Jam / Counting Crows / Foo Fighters / System Of A Down / Common / Phish / My Morning Jacket / Cake / Iron & Wine / Norah Jones / Audioslave / Ben Folds / Jet / Seu Jorge / The Walkmen / Artic Monkeys / Alanis Morissette / Fugees / Outkast / The Cranberries / Ryan Adams / The Flaming Lips / Bruce Springstein / Bloc Party / Snoop Dogg / Dispatch / Guster / Nas /

On the question board, support or deny these:
My Chemical Romance, Clipse, Ben Harper, David Gray, Interpol, Gorillaz, Christina Aguilera, Bright Eyes, Rilo Kiley

I'll start: I vote for Clipse and MCR. I'll vote against the Gorillaz but for Danger Mouse (Gorillaz, DANGERDOOM, The Grey Album, Gnarls Barkley, Pelican City)

The Best Band ... Go!

2006-07-18T23:05:00.000-04:00

I’ve been kicking around an idea in my head and now I need your help. I am going to try to compile a list of bands who have released great albums in 1994 or after (Picked to mark my entry into new music with Green Day’s Dookie). My only other criterion: that the released album be of new music that represents a major shift or growth for the band or artist in question. For example, the Beatles’s One doesn’t count. It is not required, however, that all of their post-94 albums be great, just one.

My goal: to present all of the listed bands’ albums that came out after ’94 as my thesis that music in my memorable life isn’t worse than the music that came before it. I believe this because I think to believe otherwise would deny the human ear and brain its constancy, among other reasons.

Below is a good starter list, invariably missing some important artists. Please, help me fill in the blanks – and defend your picks. Or, tell me which ones are total bogus.

Radiohead / Green Day / The Strokes / The White Stripes / Dave Matthews Band / Death Cab For Cutie / The Postal Service / Sufjan Stevens / Kanye West / No Doubt / Tool / Rage Against The Machine / Red Hot Chili Peppers / Robert Randolph & The Family Band / The Neptunes / Johnny Cash / Notorious B.I.G. / Tupac Shakur / Dr. Dre / Beastie Boys / Jay-Z / Bjork / Oasis / Garbage / Wu-Tang Clan / Nirvana / Coldplay / The Smashing Pumpkins / Blackstar / Sublime / Justin Timberlake / John Mayer / blink182 / The Shins / Modest Mouse / Weezer / Clap Your Hands Say Yeah! / Beck / The Mars Volta / Jack Johnson / Franz Ferdinand / Jamiroquai / Ben Harper / Pearl Jam / Counting Crows / Foo Fighters / System Of A Down / Common / Phish / My Morning Jacket / Cake / Iron & Wine / Norah Jones / Audioslave / Ben Folds / Jet / Seu Jorge / The Walkmen / Artic Monkeys / Alanis Morissette / Fugees / Outkast / The Cranberries /

Donating Blood

2006-07-17T16:10:00.000-04:00

This is not for the faint of stomach. Don't read on if the thought of blood disturbs you.

I had a friend (who will remain unnamed) who needed to borrow a tampon, but was too shy to ask the other girls in the newsroom. So, naturally, I did it for her ... via gchat in this week's ... Chats With Manch, episode 5, "We're not embarrassed"

me: do you have a tampon i could borrow?
please let me know soon

Michelle: nope but i have a dime for the machine in the bathroom
just put some toilet paper in your underwear to catch the menstrual blood

me: that is true
but I don't want to do that really
it just gets too messy

Michelle: u can take my underwear to use. i'm not raggin
i don't know why it doesn't embarrass me to say those things, sam.

The End.

Awe Some Day

2006-07-15T17:33:00.000-04:00

I hate excessive humidity, and that hate is compounded with excessive temperatures. Today, I awoke to this sweet note, an emergency communique from the National Weather Service:

A HOT AND HUMID AIRMASS WILL BE ENTRENCHED ACROSS THE SOUTHERN
GREAT LAKES REGION. SUNDAY AFTERNOON TEMPERATURES WILL BE IN THE
LOWER AND MID 90S...COMBINED WITH DEWPOINTS AROUND 70...WILL
RESULT IN HEAT INDICES BETWEEN 100 AND 105 DEGREES.

I don't know why they have to type in all caps every time, but the note pretty much sums up the basis for an awesome day of work.

Also, I dropped my cell phone in a portable toilet. Yes, I fished it out. And, no, it doesn't work very well.

Wait for it ... Yes, I stuck my hands in a port-a-potty. Yes, I washed them. Yes, it is still gross that I did that. No more questions.

Look for a sweet Corazza-Nissen combo coming soon. More when I know more.

Artist of the Week

2006-07-11T23:49:00.000-04:00

This week's artist is Thom Yorke. His claim to fame: he's the lead singer of the best band of my life time, better known as Radiohead.

Yorke's Eraser album is his first solo project, and, no worries, Radiohead marches on with him at the helm.

Sample lyrics:

And it rained all night and then all day
The drops were the size of your hands and face
The worms come out to see what's up
We pull the cars up from the river

It's relentless
Invisible
Indefatigable
Indisputable
Undeniable

So how come it looks so beautiful?
How come the moon falls from the sky?

I can see you
But I can never reach you

God sees even the smallest sparrow fall

2006-07-10T17:43:00.000-04:00

"God's the ultimate playa, so naturally He's going to have some haters," rapper Ice Cube said. "But these haters need to realize that if you mess with the man upstairs, you will get your ass smote. True dat."

Courtesy of DW.

Sorry to the fans, but these crackers weren't playing fair

2006-07-10T14:47:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the absence…

Introducing Down to the Dwire, Deux, Episode 1, "Ghostbustin'"

Kevin: i just read your blog and it made me slime
i mean smile
weird how those have the same letters
me: "i totally slimed all over her face"
Kevin: kind of like when i slimed on your auntie's toes yesterday
me: right
Kevin: man i'm tired
i've spent all morning
lying to the baby, telling him it's ajax
me: its tough to do
Kevin: if Clipse doesn't come out with a second CD
Kevin: i'm going to slime on their record label

The following motion picture was approved for awesomeness.

2006-07-07T16:16:00.000-04:00

http://www.transformersmovie.com/

Robots in disguise. Killer.

Better news yet:
http://www.audioholics.com/news/pressreleases/VoltronLiveActionMovie.php

It's a celebration

2006-07-05T17:40:00.000-04:00

Time to celebrate my 100th post!
What better day to do it, on the eve of my president’s 60th birthday.

Time for Chats With Manch, episode 4, “Chipotle”
(Note: this is long, but easily the best Manch-related text in the world. Do read on!)

Michelle: u never answered
"how do you feel about chocolate milk"
Michelle: you're a turkey sub
me: that doesn't make any sense
Michelle: u mean cents
Michelle: do u know what toe jam is
me: yes.
Michelle: no but i can articulate the constraining binary system of gender is western cultuuuuures
me: well shit on a stick
Michelle: i already shit in your car
is that fine
me: good news
Michelle: there were little carrot bits in it
me: it's cool, because when I spread my chocolate smear on your bed it had some of chipotle's corn salsa in it and you know how corn never breaks down
Michelle: i think you need to clean up the corn bits from your turds in my carpet
me: did i get some on your carpet?
I just wanted to leave a present for you on the bed, but I guess I was just too eager
Michelle: yeah u can just bring me some clorox wipes tomorrow
me: ok, yeah, sounds good
i don't remember seeing you much last night
but maybe that was because you weren't standing on top of my car
Michelle: i was swimming most of the time
me: oh, right
Michelle: that river was bundles of fun
me: dog got in the river for a while
Michelle: yeah we made love
me: you and dog?
Michelle: yeah why
Michelle: coolio
gangsta's paradise
me: yeah, that's how most would describe how i been spendin most my life
Michelle: stop making skin cancer jokes
Michelle: ok sure but u owe me a fruit roll up
Michelle: that's confusing but i like candy
me: i hate candy
Michelle: cept for them hot tamales, they's good
Michelle: i like cafeteria meals
me: me too
i loved the turkey tetrazini (sp?) at my hs cafeteria. plus that cheap ass rectangle pizza
Michelle: mm i forgot about rectangle pizza, how i miss thee
me: don't question my authority
Michelle: i'd never q the authority of a hermaphrodite
Michelle: laughter pervades gchat
Michelle: "no," said cultural studies scholar and writer John Fiske.
Michelle: that's my fave quote
me: that fiske doesn't mince words
Michelle: is it ok if i get us best friend necklaces
me: yes
Michelle: :) k i'll look for em
KBYE

The End.

I'm still waiting on the necklace.

Michael Jordan is no Lance Armstrong

2006-07-02T13:54:00.000-04:00

I usually let my friends at http://www.wearethepostmen.com take care of blogging about sports. They consume more information than I do about most topics. The Postmen write with hilarity and style.

But, with no Tour de France posts, I must present this …

It turns out that Lance Armstrong’s closest competitor, Jan Ullrich, cheated. Ullrich juiced. He used steroids to improve his stamina. Other good riders juiced with Ullrich, using the same Spanish doctor.

This begs questions. If Ullrich can pass drug tests while using drugs, did Lance? What about riders not implicated in the current scandal? What about the MLB, NFL, NBA, etc. If testing doesn’t work, it seems fair to question sports.

It also says a lot about us. We want our athletes like we want our Burger King. Bigger = better. More is the new less. Grandiose and dominance are the new subtle.

But what about Lance’s record setting run? There are two possibilities here.

1) Lance doped. He cheated the way most other great riders of this era. OK, so he’s like Canseco or McGuire: best in a bad era. Still great feats, but his accomplishments should not be compared to those of previous eras. Or …

2) He didn’t cheat. He used the prescribed drugs to recover from cancer and is a freak of nature. This idea is what inspired this post. I wanted to lay this out there: If Lance Armstrong did not dope, and many of his competitors did, he is the greatest athlete in recorded history. I don’t think I need to argue the merits of winning a Tour. That’s a feat only reached by 58 people ever. Lance did it 7 times. He’s one of only 8 to win the Tour more than 2 times. Add to that his absurd title fight against cancer. Everyone knows the story, but I think lance got it best in Dodgeball: “You know, once I was thinking of quitting when I was diagnosed with brain, lung and testicular cancer all at the same time. But with the love and support of my friends and family, I got back on the bike and won the Tour de France five times in a row.”

Chats with the Berr, episode 2, "Bill O'Reilly"

2006-07-02T00:13:00.000-04:00

me: herro?
Lindsey: oh hi
sorry i was factoring a polynomial
nabd

The End.

Chats with Manch, episode 3, "Do It For The Kids"

2006-07-02T00:07:00.000-04:00

Michelle: u left your bike shorts in my fanny pack
i washed the skidmarks out
me: what are you doing with the rest of the summer?
Michelle: i'm taking classes and raising the twins
me: i'll get you the child support soon
Michelle: in the form of illegal drugs is fine
again
Michelle: are you ever coming to bloomy
me: NEVER
Michelle: meepers
me: i don't have any money so...
Michelle: i don't need dinner or gucci linen
just the gucci nails with baby jesuses on the thumbs
is what i want.

The End.

Can't Stop, Won't Stop

2006-06-30T09:02:00.000-04:00

Republicans attack freedom of speech, again. But only when it fits their motif.

The House of Representatives passed a resolution to chide the New York Times for its article about the tracking of bank transfers. This brings us to our quote of the week:

Talking to Republican representatives Representative Jane Harman, a California Democrat, said:
"If anyone wants to live in a society where journalists are thrown in prison, I encourage them to move to Cuba, China or North Korea to see if they feel safer."

Pick-up Lines

2006-06-29T19:43:00.000-04:00

Looking back at old gchat messages made me realize: My girlfriend is damn funny, too. So, I give to you, my second series of chats. This will mostly be one-liners and short stories she tells me that I find hilarious. I like these because she notices, and thinks are crazy, the same things I do.

Chats with the Berr, episode 1 "Summer School"

Lindsey: <3
no love?
i poo on your love

Lindsey: ps when i sat down in class yesterday there was a girl next to be reading psalms and proverbs from the new testement to pass the time

Lindsey: there was a guy playing a video game next to me earlier
and he kept saying under his breath "die...damnit. kill him, die"

The End.

Chats With Manch, Episode 2

2006-06-29T19:31:00.000-04:00

Chats With Manch, episode 2 "Attack Of The Clones"

Michelle: your butt looks big in those pants
but who's to say big connotates something negative ...
i'm desinging city state and SAM NISSAN CARS was one of the editors in the default tag

Me: good one
never heard that joke before

Michelle: i can't be on fire all the time
except in my pants

The End.

Satan's Depot: Eat Here, Don't Get Gas

2006-06-29T19:07:00.000-04:00

I thought I had discovered it all. I thought I had climbed the mountains, swam the oceans and conquered the lands: The worst gas station, this great explorer, me, decided ever was our Dear Uncle Gertrude here in Fort Weezy. I was wrong.

So I get off I69 at State Road 331. I guess that's where it all goes downhill. I rolled up to the Citgo because it was less busy than the flashy looking BP across the street. I soon learned why.

The pumps looked ancient, but almost quaint. But, just like with our dear Uncle Gertrude, I won't discriminate. The pumps were old, sure, but I can deal with it. Your mom is old; I can still deal with her. And deal I do!

Not this place. It was like a scene from a terrible horror movie. (Oops, redundancy: all horror movies are terrible. It was like a scene from a horror movie.)

The station had different buttons for "cash" and "credit." At these pumps you can't pay at the pump. In fact, they were so old, there was only regular at the time they were invented. I don't know when that is, but I'm sure Ulysses S. Grant was still drinking on the job somewhere.

The building was in such bad shape, I thought for sure I was on the set of The Hills Have Eyes or something equally fucked up. This is it. I am going to die my cinematic debut death right here.

But worse yet, the credit option was 10 cents more per gallon. Fuck all that. I don’t play that. I haven’t met someone yet who, driving from out of town, always carries $60 on them, just in case Henry Ford is still operating a gas station somewhere in America and hasn’t caught up with the times. I don’t have that kind of cash! Shit. (I don’t know why I am cursing so much today …)

Needless to say, I went to the BP.

My own campaign

2006-06-27T21:44:00.000-04:00

I think Michelle Manchir is the funniest person walking.

Don't take offense anyone, but she's just dead funny, especially on gmail chat. So, I think, with out asking for her permission, I am going to begin a series called Chats With Manch. Today's topic: sexism. They will be edited for time and content, but just to keep the funny stuff flowing.

Chats With Manch, episode 1 "Meth Is For Winners, Cub Scouts"
Michelle: i got to be a girl scout and sell cookies and learn how to be a mom

me: i learned how to say "woman, go make me a sandwich" in the cub scouts

Michelle: how about a nice fresh fruit plate

me: fine I'll take the fruit. Just make it snappy
or i'll hit you again

Michelle: i know it's just because you love me.

me: damn straight
plus, I don't mean to drink so much, I just do it sometimes on accident
but i'm not addicted

Michelle: i know your work is stressful baby

me: and the meth - that's just so we can buy that new trailer and go down and live in tijuana
i know it was always your dream to raise my kids

Michelle: i don't gots no complaints bout u

The End.

Band of the Week

2006-06-27T21:40:00.000-04:00

Built To Spill

Sample lyric:
“When I was a kid I saw a light
Floating high above the trees one night
Thought it was an alien
Turned out to be just God.”

And you know I love campy shit like that. And I should kill myself for using the word campy … twice over.

When I was a young boy, I hated freedom

2006-06-26T21:47:00.000-04:00

I try to curtail my political outrage on my blog. I know some of my friends don't want to hear my politics more than I want to hear their's.

But today, fuck 'em.

I'm staying with the story of the Bush administration's contempt for the media in the hopes that you might come here for something witty (since I am so dashingly funny), and bam! You've gotten my opinion even if you didn't want it.

Following in Cheney's footsteps as usual, the president of the United States took time out of his day to criticize The New York Times for printing things it knew to be true. I know he grew up in another country called Texas, but in my country telling the truth is sometimes encouraged and always legal.

His justification: Congress was briefed. Sweet. I forgot that, if Parliment was briefed, the King could do whatever he wanted (We carried it over from British Commonlaw, don't worry about it.)

Four more years! Four more years! Four more years!

I feel like I'm taking fucking crazy pills or something.

Reading is for losers

2006-06-25T19:25:00.000-04:00

I'm going to write I book. I decided a few months ago to write a book. Well, not really write anything, but just compile my awesome and absurd spam e-mails and make it a campy coffeetable book. I had intentions to do it this summer, but since I don't have access to a designing program of my liking nor the time, it will have to wait until I get back to Bloomington.

But, to appease my loyal six readers, I'll be posting a preview of some wonderful content that might grace the pages of my book-to-be. This wondeful gem comes to us from Lucinda Webb (pvbhzpzuvbpy@th-group.com). (I'm including e-mail addresses because the spam-crawlers that nabbed mine off the internet for their mailing lists will pick up their own e-mail addresses. Eventually they could be sending themselves spam.)

To: scnewman@indiana.edu
Re: Contact

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So there you have it folks. Roundup climaz analogy ywca! Just Clisk here. Asparagine!

Hell is real, I've been there

2006-06-24T21:23:00.000-04:00

The worst gas station of all time is in Fort Wayne. I’ve been there.

First, the station name, Lassus Handy-Dandy, is gayer than your uncle Gertrude.

But I feel I am an open guy. I can’t discriminate against a gas station because it was born with a preference for the same sex.

So I start pumping and read the sign that warns anyone with a 2007 model year or higher car that the gas is not fit for their car. Not a problem for me since my car is 16 years younger than that yet-to-happen year. I grabbed the windshield scraper to get some tough water spots off my windshield. That was a mistake.

The piece of shit made my window dirtier. The sludge coming off the brush just sort of spread the dirt around. Handy my ass. So, naturally I smelled it. I’ve taken a dump sweeter than that stench. I had to scrub for half an hour to remove the poop stains from my windshield. Let me know if that phrase is ever uttered again.

So I’m pissed that my matchbox sized car is taking it in the tail pipe with a half of a tank for 24 dollars. And I’m pissed about the toxic water I just spread across my windshield.

I hang up the nozzle and hit the YES button beeping loudly at me. I want my receipt. I hate not getting a receipt. It feels like I will be immediately and unfairly arrested for not paying for my gas to not get a receipt. You can see where this is going.

The fucker spits a blank line of paper at me that’s about 30 yards long. I just left it hanging there. Hell is real folks.

So I go inside to see if I can at least score some cheap beer to drown my sorrows. No. I was wrong. No fucking beer.

There’s no black hole at the center of the universe. There’s a black hole in a BP in eastern Fort Wayne.

Oh, How I Love Dick

2006-06-24T10:26:00.000-04:00

Facts anger Cheney

US Vice-President Dick Cheney has condemned as "offensive" US media disclosures of things that were actually happening.

The government has covertly subverted American freedoms for nearly five years as part of its so-called war on terror.

Mr Cheney said leaking the media's leaking of the truth played into the enemy's hands.

Speaking in Chicago, Mr Cheney said the disclosures, which went ahead despite appeals from the White House, would make it more difficult for the administration to prevent future attacks.

But civil liberty groups have raised concerns that the programmes, which began soon after the 9/11 attacks in the US, may infringe individual rights to privacy.

He added: "What I find most disturbing is the fact that some in the media take it upon themselves to disclose vital national security programmes. It is obvious the people of America don't want or need to know this information."

He called it an "effective weapon in the larger war to create terror."

The treasury says the programme is strictly confined to suspected foreign terrorists. With terrorists, they say, you are guilty until proven innocent.

The New York Times, which revealed the programme, defended its coverage.

Executive editor Bill Keller said: "We remain convinced that the administration's extraordinary access to everything Americans do, however carefully targeted use of it may be, is a matter of public interest."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/5112484.stm

Do you think vegitarians really just hate plants with a vengence?

2006-06-22T21:26:00.000-04:00

I love blogging. Passive-aggressiveness channels through personal blogs through vague wording, timidity and shielded sarcasm. Fucking awesome. But I've found a few blogs that rise above the natural tendencies for everyone to turn into an 11-year-old girl with a diary.

I have never told them this (are you seeing the themes?), but I really respect Raz and Eamonn for http://www.wearethepostmen.com. It's why I did the banner for the site, because I just wanted to attach myself to such a brilliant idea. So congratulations on that fellas. It should prove a successful business model and, more than that, a meeting place for friends, a shiny example of your complimentary talents and just fun. That's enough sucking them off.

I also like this blog that Raz shouted out: http://fatherknowsshit.blogspot.com. This father of one rates children's books (all of which are "gay"), bashes his inlaws and ridicules the simplicity of his newborn's life. In otherwords, hilariously awesome.

Also, I have some new friends at my new secret blog. Or something. Yea! for facebook additions.

I hate you all! :)

I don't not believe in god.

2006-06-22T21:19:00.000-04:00

I don't travel in circles where people say, "I have faith, I believe this in my heart and nothing you can say or do can shake my faith." That's just a long-winded religious way to say, "shut up," or another two words that the FCC likes less. But all obscenity is less insulting than, "How I was brought up and my imaginary friend means more to me than anything you can ever say or do." So, believing there is no God lets me be proven wrong and that's always fun. It means I'm learning something.
-Penn Jillette

So I read this from Penn of Penn & Teller fame. I don't not believe in the existence of God, and I don't believe necessarily believing makes you unteachable. But his argument is otherwise flawless.

Raz: a god among mortals?

2006-06-21T15:24:00.000-04:00

Our friendly neighborhood Ryan found his way onto a BBC article about Africa. Awesome.

Such ecstasy was shared by Ryan Corazza later in the week when Tunisia played Saudi Arabia. On Dead Spin's live blog he described it as the "most exciting tie I have ever seen in my life".

"To Tunisia and Saudi Arabia, thanks for making a seemingly boring game pretty kick-ass."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/5084966.stm

Raindrops keep fallin on my head now

2006-06-21T13:59:00.000-04:00

Final report of the nerd convention: We left a little early, and I find I’m just a little nostalgic. The newspaper talent concentrated during the conference probably exceeds that of many professional newspapers. Participants empathize with E and I – they have the same problems. But more than commiseration, they provide a clear window into the future of journalism. Combined we are the Captain Planet, er … each paper struggles to innovate – each of us bring one or two fantastic ideas. Together, we at least had 25 fantastic ideas.

But it’s not all dreams and unicorns in Sam Land. (Unicorns are that great anyway. There name is ‘single corn.’ Losers.) The rain that beat us up during the ride up found us on the way back. I was driving this time, forced to slow to 40 to increase potential reaction time. A driving barge of garbage nearly forced the Taurus of the road. And Michigan construction is hilarious, if it doesn’t try to kill you. The rain put visibility of taillights at about 30 feet – stop and you’re dead. Go to fast, you can hydroplane, rearend or losecontrol.

But now, I am wiped. I need to launder my clothing, clear the beer out of my head and catch up on some sleep.

Peace is possible. War hurts.

Three Rivers Jackson

2006-06-21T13:58:00.000-04:00

I thought sitting in a conference would be more boring than it is. But here we are, and it’s really been fine.

Last night we split 24 miller lites … with devastating results for my head and stomach. But I’ve got some water and some aspirin, so I’ll be OK.

A journalism nerd conference has your standard personalities, just the like the IDS newsroom. So, we’re practically back in Bloomington. Except we have a beach and dunes.

We’ve met a few cool people. We decided Death Cab and Radiohead are the cat’s pajamas last night. Just chillin.

If anyone reads this, I am going to jet: it’s time for a nap.

Muck Fichigan, only sort of

2006-06-21T13:55:00.000-04:00

So Eman and I hit the water today about 6:45, and we’ve yet to meet up with our party. Cellphones are useless in Michigan, it turns out, and so is the weather. The drive up here featured rain that limited visibility to about 30 feet.

If you need to reach me desperately, call 231 873 5500, room 123.

We worry that journalism nerds will rule this convention, to our eventual demise. Really, we are hoping to meet a few cool people and spend some afternoon on the beach, maybe with a few cold ones, not doing a god damn thing.

I have wireless every once in a while, so … scnissen@indiana.edu will still work.

Other than that, listen to some Gnarls Barkley and Bright Eyes if you get the chance.

Over and out.

1-2 Step

2006-06-16T20:30:00.000-04:00

The world needs new 12 step programs for me, including Peanut M&M addicts anonymous, Law & Order addicts anonymous and music addicts anonymous.

What's been going on?

2006-06-16T10:45:00.000-04:00

So here’s my life in a nut shell:

The Fort Wayne News-Sentinel.

I am only supposed to work 40 hours a week, even though I am salaried – I don’t get it. But I like my job, though I hope the assignments continue to get better.

I’ve been doing some business stories, so you can check me out.

Anyway, here’s what else is going on:
Lindsey’s birthday was Thursday. I love that girl.
Dwire is interviewing Tiger Woods. That’s hot. I miss him.
Laura is going to see the Neville Brothers. Jealous.
I missed the Dave concert this year, which generally makes me want to kill myself. Not really, I would never do that.
Eamonn and I will be chillin soon in Michigan, so say word.
Maggie’s got a cush job, complete with a Crackberry and a laptop.
Brittany’s life is hard right now.
Rick rules the world from Louisville, Kentucky at http://dailystupids.blogspot.com/
Mateo the Italian Stallion has dropped off the face of the earth.
Raz is the King of Pop Culture at http://www.wearethepostmen.com/
I am continuing to decode messages from Janosch … more on that when I solve riddle with my Nancy Drew decoder ring.
Michelle is creepier than ever … but for serious – she might be the funniest person walking.
I’ve seen dispatches from the land of Kacie Foster. I think she said S.O.S. …
Cordell is … well, Happy Dad’s Day, friend.
I owe Mix a call back … sorry homie, soon enough: I don’t get cell reception at the office or at home. This town will kill me before long.
Danforth’s phone is off. Cool, dude.

Ok, so if I forgot you, I’m sorry. More soon.

Music4theMasses

2006-06-16T10:38:00.000-04:00

Here’s what I’ve been listening to:

The Walkmen
My Morning Jacket
Nick Drake
Pearl Jam’s new one
Neil Young – Prairie Wind
Ted Leo + Pharmacists
Taking Back Sunday
Artic Monkeys
Gomez
Bright Eyes
Built To Spill
Sly & the Family Stone

Enjoy.

I came back...

2006-06-16T10:25:00.000-04:00

I try to let google run my life at every turn, so I switched to their new program for blogging. But the program sucks, and I suck at keeping up a blog anyway. So, now, I guess I am back. Here goes nothing ...

Look for some fun posts soon.

Love,
Sam

Check me out

2006-03-23T00:17:00.000-05:00

I've moved: http://scnissen.googlepages.com/

See you there.

The adventures of kiss and tell

2006-02-05T15:10:00.000-05:00

I think, after publicly scorning me for trying to look after her, Brittany and I are even … especially after a 4 a.m. drop-off.

In other news, I miss my Chuck Dees. Holla if you might be in Omaha this summer! HOLLA!

So this weekend I spent recovering from last weekend where Clint made a kid the poster child for “Fly or Die,” a woman denied the Roman senate their cigars, Tosha and I ran from the police (after I saw her naked), I drank the most delicious Everclear ever and Chuck and I had ourselves a oxygenated weekend.

I still don’t have my DVDs, but I’ll live.

Ben, sorry buddy, after Bob Saggat told the dirtiest, raunchiest and funniest joke I’ve ever heard, I had to lay down for a bit … like 8 hours.

For those who don’t know, now you know: I live above a gross smelling restaurant, I spend all my money on Chipotle, Jimmy John’s and CDs. But I love it.

I’ll try to update more often this if anyone reads on a regular basis … or ever.

The B Word

2006-01-17T22:38:00.000-05:00

Damn, I am so busy. I always have great topics to write about ... until I sit down to write. That figures.

Anywho, turning 21 is as amazing as everyone makes it out to be. The bars are like a party you don’t have to organize or clean up. But since it’s so expensive, I might not find myself there this weekend.

Alright, well, here’s what’s hot:

1) Eamonn Brennan: If you don’t know, now you know
2) Tuna Noodle Casserole
3) Pharrell
4) Not being IU President Adam Herbert
5) Chipotle chips with sour cream for dip

Here’s what’s not:
1) Being from anywhere in Pennsylvania outside of Philly
2) Being from anywhere in West Virginia
3) Chipotle Burritos: I love them, but I hate them
4) Lil’ Kim
5) Tie: Camo pants / Pussycat Dolls

That’s what I’ve got for now, with one last tidbit: Joey Porter should be barred from speaking.

One love, except for sore winners.

Great year in music?

2005-09-03T13:44:00.000-05:00

This might be our generation's greatest year, musically speaking. The last time new music was so generally mature, fun, talent-laden and important was in the early nineties, and before then - the 70s.

Take a look at the evidence:

Already out:
Coldplay – X&Y
White Stripes – Get Behind Me Satan
Dave Matthews Band – Stand Up
M.I.A. – Arular
Death Cab For Cutie – Plans
Kayne West – Late Registration
Kings of Leon – Aha Shake Heartbreak
Gorillaz – Demon Days
Ben Folds – Songs For Silverman
Beck – Guero
Jack Johnson – In Between Dreams
The Killers – Hot Fuss
Slim Thug – Already Platinum

To release CDs:
Neil Young
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Pharrell
Santana
Damian Marley

Screwdriver

2005-09-01T20:24:00.000-05:00

Where's the story: who should be coordinating law enforcement for New Orleans? Ummm... Didn't President Bush appoint someone to do exactly that. Oh wait, he did. Well done so far - not.

I feel so bad for the police and those trapped by the water. I have little sympathy for those who chose not to leave, but the others ... I would not want to be there.

Can we mobilize right now? Or, perhaps, before now. These people are so desperate for food, water and a chance to take a dump.

The water is tainted if not deadly around them. I can't even imagine. I feel like going to New Orleans after the shots are all fired.

Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers

2005-08-20T20:51:00.000-05:00

Pharrell will compose the soundtrack to the Voltron live action movie to drop in 2006. Voltron and Pharrell: like white on rice. Should be stunning.

Freedom? No, it's WAR.

2005-08-16T08:19:00.000-05:00

I am fond the bumper stickers that say "Freedom isn't free." I have some really bad news for the bumper industry: *Psst: yes it is. The most basic definition of freedom is: "The condition of being free." If freedom isn't free, then where did the founding fathers come up with the idea of inalienable rights? Here's what the bumpers stickers should say: "War isn't free."

On that note, here's a few fun factoids:

A study at the US Army's Walter Reed hospital in Washington, DC, found that up to 17% of Iraq veterans - about one in six - suffered depression, anxiety or PTSD.

The divorce rate among US army officers has tripled in the past three years.

The National Coalition for Homeless Veterans says that in 2004 its affiliates helped 67 veterans of Iraq or Afghanistan - only a year or two into those conflicts. That set off alarm bells at the charity, since experts say it took traumatised Vietnam veterans an average 12-15 years to end up in shelters.

Vet Centers - community outreach counselling centres set up by the US Department of Veterans' Affairs - have seen nearly 19,000 Iraq or Afghanistan veterans to date.

Land Ho!

2005-08-09T21:22:00.000-05:00

Look for Pharrell Williams to release his first solo album In My Mind this fall.

You might recognize Pharrell as he's produced Jay-z "Excuse Me Miss," Jay-z "Change Clothes," Nelly "Hot in Herre," Britany Spears "I'm A Slave 4 U," Britany Spears "Boys," Fabulous "Holla Back Young'n," Clipse "Grindin'," Justin Timberlake "Senorita," Justin Timberlake "Rock Your Body," Mystikal "Shake Your Ass," Kelis "Milkshake," Snoop Dogg "Drop It Like It's Hot," Snoop Dogg "Beautiful," Will Smith "Gettin Jiggy With It," Gwen Stefani "Holla Back Girl," Usher "U Dont Have To Call," Slim Thug "Like A Boss," Slim Thug "Already Platinum," Ludacris "Southern Hospitality" and LL Cool J "Love You Better," among others.

The Queen is in my backyard

2005-08-09T21:12:00.000-05:00

Some music I've been listening to recently:

Death Cab - Translantacism
Weezer - Make Believe
Led Zeppelin - I, II, III or IV
Guster - Keep It Together
Jason Mraz - Mr. A-Z
Coldplay - X&Y
Slim Thug - Already Platinum
Mos Def - A New Danger
Clipse - Lord Willin'
Kings of Leon - Aha Shake Heartbreak
Jack Johnson - In Between Dreams
Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds - Live at Luther College
Bloc Party - Silent Alarm
Counting Crows - Films About Ghosts
James Brown - 50th Anniversary

That's certainly not all, but that's all for now.
Peace is possible.

The human torch was denied a bank loan

2005-07-31T12:07:00.000-05:00

the stars are so damn pretty in the country. I wish I could look up and see thousands of holes to heaven any time I wanted.

Never have I ever ... tackled Tosha so hard: sorry homie.

Two weekend nights and I probably couldn't have remember my name after 10 p.m. either night. I love hangin with Clinton Anthony, Chuck Dees, The Forth (a.k.a. Tina Fey a.k.a. The Elephant in the Room), Toosh, Samantha (Steve is back), Andrew Joesph - every time... Plus we always have some golden newcomers (you know who you are). Chuck: you know I gotta get double of those pics. (Who? Mike Jones.) Props out to Ryan, too - good times is always the case with you and me. Have fun in London, bra.

Some shoes on the car roof, two cats, coyotes, knives, one peed-on cat, one night at the roxbury CD, two tackles, five hours sleep, two devistated gas station bathrooms, two full moons and an absurd tent later, I feel like a million bucks.

Me: Where are my pants? Why am I not wearing any pants?
Chuck: I don't know where my pants are either. Do you like my boxers? ... You tried to cuddle with me last night... Samantha saw it.
Sam: Yeah you did.
Me: Those are nice boxers! Where's A.J.? What did I spill all over my shirt? What's on my hand?... and where the hell are my pants?

...

(A.J.: Wouldn't it be weird if you didn't have any hair down there?
Me: Have you ever... No, nevermind. Please don't tell me. I don't want to know.)

How now brown cow

2005-07-24T16:42:00.000-05:00

ATL-recovery mode right now.

Arriving in Atlanta at 2 a.m. was great, but not as awesome as chugging tequila and corona with a stripper and Peyton Manning when I got there... an alcohol filled night and two hours of sleep were followed by a nap and some Cracker Barrel breakfast. Then, it was off to grab Danforth and AJ (the appliance versions) and prepare for a meal that could make grown men weep. Cheese and bacon stuffed chicken served over home made macaroni/alfredo sauce and wheat noodles plus grilled onions and veggy skewers. For desert: peanut butter cup brownies topped with melted peanut butter and peanut butter cup ice cream. Plus, we had some Sweet Water and Amber Bock beer... A meal to die for... But now, I am so damn dehydrated from the alcohol and sun. I loves me some southerners, but why georgia, why?

Movies

2005-07-20T21:01:00.000-05:00

Just some movies worth checking out:

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Ironfist Pillage
Borne Supremecy/Identity
Big Fish
Airplane

Some CDs of note:
M.I.A. - Arular
Kings of Leon - Aha Shake Heartbreak
White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
Clipse - Lord Willin'
R. Kelly - TP3 Reloaded

Ok, that's it for now.

In other news...

2005-07-10T22:15:00.000-05:00

So far today I've discovered...

President Bush (along with Detroit automakers) has been informed by leading economists that the only way for Detroit to save jobs is to make cars that use less gas, but has yet to move to protect American jobs.

The president doesn't want you to be able to die with dignity if you are considered terminally ill with less than six months to live by three independant doctors.

Someone in the president's administration has already lied about revealing the identity of a C.I.A. agent risking her and her family's lives.

This blog you are reading is considered an online magazine and therefore is subject to the same rules as Time or Newsweek - I cannot donate unlimited amounts of money to campaigns in the name of my blog. Which is fine, until you realize THIS IS NOT AN ONLINE MAGAZINE. I probably have a readership of 4! Does that mean I can be found to be libelous or obscene, like Time or Newsweek can?
Well, let's find out: Fuck President Bush. He is a war criminal (not to mention a money grubbing, fake corporatist) and has lied to the American public on more than one occasion. The 2004 Presidential was rigged in case it didn't go Bush's way and the 2000 Presidential election was rigged flat out.

I guess I have yet to be libelous... I can prove everything I wrote.

Do you think I could be dreaming this?

2005-07-02T16:28:00.000-05:00

"Sugar ain't poisin, but sugar will kill you. Too much of a good thing - it's not so sweet."

So far on Live 8 I've seen Sting modify Every Breath You Take to speak directly to world leaders, watched Green Day cover Queen's We Are The Champions and heard Maroon 5 do Neil Young's Rockin In The Free World (which, if you listen, is mostly a slam of Reagan and Bush, Sr. and how they hurt the poor).

On the other hand I hate MTV for showing so little of the London and Philly shows. But it's all available online to watch, so it's all good. And, later, Pink Floyd will reunite for what is likely to be their last show ever together.

Wanna give props to those who showed up for Sausagefest 2k5. I haven't had a ratio that bad since high school, and it was quite nostalgic. Speaking of high school-era nostalgia: My home address is now in Fort Wayne ... That's awesome. And I sold my car, which, while it gave me many good memories, was a beatup piece at this point. If cars could talk, man would the old 'Trep have some fun stories to tell ... So, two of the most important parts of my teenage years are sold - in someone else's hands. Life goes on!

Be cool, my babies. Peace, love and understanding.

Tubes, underage, Mrs. Smith and genocide

2005-06-26T21:14:00.000-05:00

So I must say, continuing with the math theme, that Clint + Me = stupid fun always. Then take that formula for everyone else from this weekend. And then double the shout outs for the Forth (aka. Tina Fey), cause no matter what he holds it down with me. And a sorry to Chuck for indirectly bending his needle, but props for being hilarious (the latter also applies to Andrew Joesph, M.Y., Jenna, targetsexual, Sammy, Clint).

In other news, my new nickname might be sister-flirter, which is not good news, but nonetheless fair. Also, a year ago today (actually tomorrow at about 1 a.m.), I ...
If you can fill in that blank, you might know too much about me.

Happy Birthday Andrea!

So my parents are moving to Fort Wayne (a city named after a guy who loved to kill people with red skin). That's pretty much the best thing that's happened ... ever.

One last piece of business: the new White Stripes album is HOT. But the most underrated albums of this year are going to be: the Transplants and The Mars Volta.
Do Travis Barker a favor and pick up Haunted Cities from the Transplants.

Love you all! Peace is possible.

Veritable.

2005-06-19T01:50:00.000-05:00

So... um, you stay classy.

In other news, this was a different day. I woke up this morning and realized everything changes, but everything is always the same. That's a hell of a realization to have at 8:30 a.m. With no time to ponder my philsophical revelation, I wandered up to Indy for a conference. The conference was like deja-vu times 1000 (plus I felt like I was seeing clearly into my future today), except I was too tired to care and too tired to make myself care, which made my day even more strange.

Among other things, I get back to town, down 80 oz of malt liquor and head to Taste of Bloomington. I spent five dollars, but that, some peanuts and Mike Ley are about all I remember. So after what was either five minutes or an hour and a half (I couldn't tell you which), Maggie was kind enough to drop me off at home, where I slept for a long, long time, maybe four or five hours.

Then, I had a nice rude awakening from Jordan. So, naturally, I sprayed him with Complete brand contact solution, which he used to further torture Danforth (a.k.a. the Elephant on the Couch formerly known as Tina Fey). Malik calls and off to TownieFest 2005 - the greatest thing man has ever known. The whirlwind adventure was complete with mullets, ethnic slurs and urinal cake smell. After a malt with chunks in it, a seizure and some deer hunting, it was time to leave our free entertainment. The night, though, would not be complete without a group hug, emotional speech from Mark and a "team" on three. One, two, three... [This is where you are supposed to shout "TEAM!"]

That was just an all-around strange thing, but after Jordan and I talked about coke, we stole a dry erase board and called it a night. Only to come back and find that Wondershowzen is awesome, SNL can be funny, but sucks and we had NO idea what was going on (Plus everything that happened in Jordan's life this week was on TV... plus televangelists are scamming people). We laughed at things that weren't funny and cried because we laughed so hard and couldn't stop. Sounds like a bunch of school girls and immature, but I promise you - I could NOT stop, it was creepy, which, unnaturally, made me laugh harder.

So a pretty strange day, but that's not all. Well, I guess that is all. You see, everything I typed is everything I can remember. Now I am sure that it seems like everything I typed up there is quite a bit, but I've was awake for something like 20 hours today. Aside from Erin going to Hawai'i, Dave and I talking politics, Amanda buying a chocolate covered banana and getting free peanuts, everything typed in the above paragraphs is quite literally EVERYTHING I can rememeber from the day up until about an hour ago- and it just happened. So, I came to the realization that I am on autopilot. I just hope this plane hasn't been meandering off course. I'm not sure what exactly it means to be on autopilot but I am sure I will figure it out.

Peace

{no one ever really dies. do you believe that? well, if not, then for you, it's almost over now}

2005-06-17T15:28:00.000-05:00

"Don't let anybody make you think God chose America as his divine messianic force to be - a sort of policeman of the whole world. God has a way of standing before the nations with justice and it seems I can hear God saying to America "you are too arrogant, and if you don't change your ways, I will rise up and break the backbone of your power, and I will place it in the hands of a nation that doesn't even know my name. Be still and know that I'm God. Men will beat their swords into plowshafts and their spears into pruning hooks, and nations shall not rise up against nations, neither shall they study war anymore." I don't know about you, I ain't going to study war anymore."
- MLK, Jr.

Like Whoa.

2005-06-14T21:47:00.000-05:00

((Dave Matthews Band x Robert Randolph)/June 13, 2005) + C = God. Just in case you didn't know the mathmatical formula.

The DMB concert this year was one not to miss. Both nights were great, but I have to say, the second night rocked ten times harder than anything I've seen.

The highlights:

The first six songs had me convinced we were about to get rolled on:
American Baby, The Stone, Best of Whats Around, Granny, Rhyme & Reason, Grey Street.

Then we got other oldies throughout the show: Ants Marching, Dancing Nancies, Warehouse.
Also, Robert Randolph guested on what will live on as the greatest Lousiana Bayou ever.
And Dave did a scat that included Lil' Jon references.

But the highlight to end all highlights was All Along The Watchtower with Robert to close the show. The song had an insane improv intro featuring solos from just about everyone. Most awesome though: it started raining on cue when the song started. The lightning seemed to accent every high point in the song - the crowd was literally jumping, screaming the lyrics (which they knew suprisingly well). Robert tore us a new one when he got on top of his guitar and shredded Deer Creek down from his table-steel guitar.

I hope anything I experience is ever as awesome as that night. Thanks to everyone - Tosh, Lil and Big Danforth, Colin, Stain, all of Stain's buddies, Zack and his buddy, NORTON!, Jenna, Ashley, Drunk sleeping guy, Mikael, Jacob, the cool Targetsexuals, Danforth's new gf, the nice people at the Med Tent, Andrew, Brittany, Andrew's Brother and his fam, Corance the III (who I owe 17 bones!)... If I forgot you I am sorry. Tosh - a double shoutout for two cool nights. I am glad you know I don't hate you now!

That's all for now ladies and gents. Peace in the world and I love you all,
Sam

Who is Mike Jones?

2005-06-06T07:33:00.000-05:00

Saturday night was one of the most awesome and absurd nights of my life. I am pretty sure I grinded on not only Samantha, Tosha and Brittany, but probably Chuck, Bill and Ben.
I cooked more Quesidillas then I thought possible. It turns out I am one hell of a host. Danforth and I combined to prepare the greatest meal ever made, though, I have to say, he quit early. I am simply amazed that I didn't burn myself downing Jagerbombs with Pat and Bill while cooking for hours.
After screaming *NSYNC with the girls, a guest appearance from Haley and Claire and some hilarious coversation, Ben and I waxed our 10inch air-rims to some of the worst rap ever. I stopped an unnammed someone from trying to commit suicide off a 8-foot-tall balcony. Clint ended up asleep behind the Legacy of the Incas or the Bloomington Hair Co - and he stayed there for three hours until Chuck and I found him. All the while I was stealing alcohol from everyone (thanks Tosh!).
For her birthday, we gave Meghan one charcoal, a plastic cup, a half of a pack of Camel Lights, a dash of salt, a Mountain Dew, a Git-r-dunn coozie, imitation Bubble Tape, an empty Redbull and a a homemade card in a box full of newsprint and improperly-applied gift wrap and marked "Live Rinozurizzles" and "Josh loves steroids" - the whole thing covered in some badass rain gear (a torn trashbag). It was the best gift I have ever seen - it made me weep with joy.
Then, when the night was over, Brittany, Chuck, Samantha, me and Tosha all called my bed for the night. Needless to say, five people don't fit comfortably on a futon for long - luckily, we all had to get up just 3 hours later, and we said goodbye. And good it was - thank you all for coming down, you've all got an open invitation back.

Peace in the world.

Vietnam = Iraq.

2005-06-03T17:40:00.000-05:00

"This call for a worldwide fellowship that lifts neighborly concern beyond one's tribe, race, class, and nation is in reality a call for an all-embracing and unconditional love for all mankind. This oft misunderstood, this oft misinterpreted concept, so readily dismissed ... as a weak and cowardly force, has now become an absolute necessity for the survival of man. When I speak of love I am not speaking of some sentimental and weak response. I'm not speaking of that force which is just emotional bosh. I am speaking of that force which all of the great religions have seen as the supreme unifying principle of life. Love is somehow the key that unlocks the door which leads to ultimate reality. This Hindu-Muslim-Christian-Jewish-Buddhist belief about ultimate reality is beautifully summed up in the first epistle of Saint John: 'Let us love one another, for love is God. And every one that loves is born of God and knows God. He that loves not knows not God, for God is love... If we love one another, God dwells in us and his love is perfected in us.' Let us hope that this spirit will become the order of the day.

"We can no longer afford to worship the god of hate or bow before the altar of retaliation. The oceans of history are made turbulent by the ever-rising tides of hate. History is cluttered with the wreckage of nations and individuals that pursued this self-defeating path of hate. 'Love is the ultimate force that makes for the saving choice of life and good against the damning choice of death and evil. Therefore the first hope in our inventory must be the hope that love is going to have the last word.'"

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Not for the faint of heart

2005-06-02T09:47:00.000-05:00

http://www.postsecret.com - Full of postcards people send to this person. The postcards are covered with creative representations of each anonymous sender's biggest secret. Some people have some pretty big secrets. It's nuts, check it out.

I woke up this morning in some Chinese family's living room...

2005-05-30T13:18:00.000-05:00

I can't say enough about cool people. It was nice to get out last night and just chill.

We're less than two weeks away from the DMB concert, and I am beginning to become anxious. There's nothing quite like that concert every year. That band never ceases to amaze.

Now that Orienter is out, I actually have free time, which, suprisingly, totally blows (though I must say: life is still generally great). I am bored out of my mind and up to my eyeballs in bills. So, if you know someone who's hiring - hook me up. Also, if you're reading this and not in bloomington: come visit me, please! Especially you Westfield kids - where have you been all my life?

Well folks, that's all I've got.

Peace in the world.

Overdrawn

2005-05-26T03:28:00.000-05:00

Want to loan me a few? Cause I got nothing. Well, actually, less than nothing... in my bank account that is.

Long day = 15 hours at the IDS. Tomorrow doesn't look any better. It'll all be finished friday with that, though, and life will be sane once more. Maybe then I can make enough to cover the bills. Let's hope. Ahhh, in the end everything will be OK, though. How do I know? If it is not OK, then it isn't the end.

If you're still reading this - I got nothing but love for ya'. Thanks for keeping up.

Waiting on an angel...

Sweaty and stupid...

2005-05-24T22:13:00.000-05:00

Woke up this morning at 6am after a good 3.5 hours of sleep. My heart beat was so strong - not fast, just strong - and I was hyperventilating when I woke up. I thought I was having a heart attack... so that was a new, nifty experience.

Oh well, hot chocolate and softball - what else could I ask for? Well, maybe a few more hours of sleep on the gross IDS couch.

If you're reading this, you know too much about me. Go grab a cold one for me, cause I'm grabbing my guitar and playing until my fingers bleed.

Peace in the world

Living the highlife

2005-05-24T08:27:00.000-05:00

I drink too much, I eat too much, I want too much - too much!

Steak n Shake is so awesome at 2 in the morning.

But not as awesome as firing someone! Not - rough day, good night. Thanks everyone, I'm sure I was obnoxious. So thanks for putting up with me, I really needed a good night of just hanging with friends. And I definitely needed to be living the highlife.

One love.

So bored

2005-05-22T22:38:00.000-05:00

Can't play Halo2 cause my roommate uses the living room for bedroom, can't stand AIM or Facebook anymore, can't play guitar anymore or my fingers might fall off, nothing on TV, no new DVDs to watch...

But all in all it has been a good day. Still got my DMB, and that could keep me happy for the next century. Plus two new books! (Yes, I read... for fun.)

Fact of the day: there is a facebook group titled "I am Asian, and, yes, I am good at math."
Fact of the day 2: Ron Burgundy is a member.

Still in search of the wherewithal...

Peace, yall.

Update

2005-05-22T02:09:00.000-05:00

New pictures: affirmative.

Growing a pair: that'll be a negatory.

It's crazy, I'm thinking, just knowing that world is round

2005-05-20T11:38:00.000-05:00

My cousin will graduate tomorrow and I can't be there to see it - sad day. Damn you, Orienter!
Well, I suppose the good news is I lost every file I had saved today for that piece of crap magazine. That sure is neat.
I could use many strong drinks, but I don't have time to be hungover.
Plus there's this girl I just can't muster up the courage to ask out...

All this and more - and my life remains awesome. I wouldn't trade anything that has happened to me for the world. Life is short, sweet and it happens exactly as it should - some times good, sometimes not. I'm glad I've met the people I know and I can't wait for tomorrow. (Maybe, by then, I will have grown a pair...)

Good night, everyone.

Stand Up!

2005-05-11T00:21:00.000-05:00

The DMB new album is out and it is beautiful.

Here's a preview of what will run in the IDS Weekend in a week:

Stand Up is not the Dave Matthews Band’s best album. Like how Green Day will never make another Dookie, Pearl Jam will never make another Ten and U2 will never make another Joshua Tree, DMB will never make a triplet of albums comparable to Under the Table and Dreaming, Before These Crowded Streets and Crash.

But Stand Up is a damn good album...

My first issue as Editor is in the books and I will see it printed for the first time Thursday morning.

Good night y'all.

I couldn't make this up if I tried

2005-05-08T10:27:00.000-05:00

British memo indicates Bush made intelligence fit Iraq policy
By Warren P. Strobel and John Walcott / Knight Ridder

WASHINGTON - A highly classified British memo, leaked in the midst of Britain's just-concluded election campaign, indicates that President Bush decided to overthrow Iraqi President Saddam Hussein by summer 2002 and was determined to ensure that U.S. intelligence data supported his policy. ...

"There was a perceptible shift in attitude. Military action was now seen as inevitable," the MI-6 chief said at the meeting, according to the memo. "Bush wanted to remove Saddam through military action, justified by the conjunction of terrorism and WMD," weapons of mass destruction.

The memo said "the intelligence and facts were being fixed around the policy."

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills or something

2005-05-08T10:20:00.000-05:00

Democrats voted out of N.C. church
The Associated Press

WAYNESVILLE, N.C. - A pastor who led a charge to kick out nine church members who refused to support President Bush was the talk of the town Saturday in this mountain hamlet, with ousted congregants considering hiring a lawyer.

Members of the congregation said Chandler told them during last year’s presidential campaign that anyone who planned to vote for Democratic nominee John Kerry needed to leave the church.

Longtime member Selma Morris, who was treasurer at the church, said Chandler’s sermons remained political after Bush won re-election. **P.S. That's against the law.** This past week, his comments turned to politics again at a church gathering that ended with nine members voted out. **P.S. That's also against the law.**

Bad news, folks: 'Love thy neighbor' has a new clause. You can only love your neo-conservative neighbors. Sorry for the inconvenience, but you must all stop being my friend now, and if you see me on the street, you must, by rule of God, kick my dog and push me down. It's commanded by God, so please don't try and argue with these new rules.

Alice Cooper, Dave Matthews and more

2005-05-06T20:32:00.000-05:00

Summer breeze makes me feel fine...
School's out for summer, which is just great.

Random items of the day: rent the movie I ♥ Huckabees; buy the album "Employment" by the band Kaiser Chiefs.

I heard the new Dave Matthews Band album Stand Up for the first time a few days ago. This one is not for the faint of fanaticism. The album is a far cry from Busted Stuff, but closer to Under The Table And Dreaming than anyone will give it credit for. It's a good album with some of the most beautiful songs I've heard and I am sure the summer concert will be even better. Want to hear more of what I think about this album? Wait two weeks for the Weekend issue in the Indiana Daily Student on May 19th. More about this later.

Goodbye to everyone leaving for the summer - the good times will be put on hold. Hello every one still here this summer - good times now!

When it rains, it snows...

2005-04-30T16:39:00.000-05:00

Slaptastic was an awesome time. (Slaptastic: jam as many Indiana Daily Student employees in one house, provide them with an endless stream of booze and see what happens.)

I think of Slaptastic like Las Vegas: What happens here stays here. And I suppose that is good given the intense insanity from Lori to the Stylebook to the champion keg stands to my homie Dan Click winning a battery powered fan in the raffle to Newkirk's pizza in a cup to Marky Mark Wahlberg: the Funky Aasen . And who could forget The Malik and his sweet chest hair or seeing Corazza's New Balance shoes up in the air?

I gotta give a shout out to Romey - I probably would be in the drunktank or asleep on the sidewalk at Walnut and 17th if you hadn't been headed the same direction. Another to Sanburn - Anchorman is the funniest movie ever. One last: Happy Birthday Mark!

Goodbye to the IDS seniors. I couldn't name all my favorites; you know who you are hopefully. But goodluck in your future endevors and godspeed. I loved this semester and am lucky to call myself a part of it.

This burrito is filling

2005-04-27T08:19:00.000-05:00

A few people find it necessary to talk mad shit about the Dave Matthews Band. Frankly, when that feeling comes over (that feeling you only can get listening to DMB) me at the concert this year, you will continue to have no idea what that feels like. You think only drugs can get you high. Ha!

--Ok that’s my frustrated rant for today.--

CDs worth paying for:
Beck – Sea Change
The Mars Volta – Frances the Mute
Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds – DMTR00 (bootleg)
Parliament Funkadelic – (Live)
Bob Marley – Natural Mystic
Led Zeppelin - III

IDSers: Camptastic will be fun: you should go.

On another IDS note: I love Josh Sanburn. And Dan Click.

Oh, Baxter. You are my little gentleman. I will take you to foggy London-town, because you are my little gentleman.

I'm Ron Burgundy?

2005-04-22T02:16:00.000-05:00

So, I really mailed one in today: I slept for 11 hours and didn’t even get up until my last class was nearly over. But I designed a sweet page for Friday’s paper, so I did do something today.

In other news, Yukon Gold cookies from Save-A-Lot (the food stamp store next to our apartment) are $1.49 everyday for 100+ cookies. I recommend these tasty morsels.

At any rate, I must give the proverbial shout out to my boy Ryan again. I have to say, this guitar duo played some sick combos Wednesday night.

And Janosch – you kissed me!?! What? Top 10 most absurd, all-time.

Dave and Tim?

2005-04-20T22:29:00.000-05:00

So, I played guitar with my buddy Ryan tonight. Turns out he knows about as much Dave as me and many, many more songs from other artists. I’ve been looking for an acoustic player who knew some Dave Matthews Band stuff, so I could explore the trippy shit that Tim Reynolds plays when he tours with Dave (and sometimes with the whole Band).

As luck would have it, Ryan seems to be that guy, which is dope. We created some really awesome stuff tonight. So, if anyone needs an awesome party attraction and conversation piece, just invite us over. Especially you guys out there, because girls dig that stuff. A good round of Dave, Jack Johnson and John Mayer is a wonderful thing. Plus we should be writing originals in no time, if we keep up this kind of cohesiveness.

Not to say we don’t have some work to do, but we’re a pretty good team so far. But we are looking for a singer, so if you think you fit the profile, you know who to contact … me.

In other news, my beard is absurd. Do girls dig the beard? I’ve always wondered that. I’ve heard such rumors … I imagine it is personal preference. But, based on experience, I don’t believe it.

That’s it for today, kids.

Dave, Dave, Dave...

2005-04-06T19:55:00.000-05:00

The Dave.

Dave the philosopher:

"Yeah, [peace] is a tough sell. But I can't help what I believe. I'm not saying that we should lie down and allow ourselves to be pummeled. But the great people in the world who made the most powerful changes -- very often they are people who talked about peace. Whether it's Martin Luther King or Ghandi or Nelson Mandela or Christ. I mean, what about 'Thou shall not kill' don't you understand? God said don't."

Dave the comedian (and philosopher):
"Maybe if all the politicians out there would just take a few minutes to sit back, listen to some Dave Matthews Band, and smoke some pot, maybe the world wouldn't be so fucked up."

Dave the man (and philosopher):
"A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other - maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever."

Dave the cleric (and philosopher):
“There’s no God above; there’s no hell below: it’s here with us; it’s up to us.”

Dave the musician (and philosopher):
Well... you'll just have to wait for May 10.

You never know...

2005-04-03T10:20:00.000-05:00

So, it looks like I will be editor of the magazine handed out to freshman called the Orienter. Pumped about that.

Went to a conference over the weekend. It turns out, it's been scientifically proven that I am a 100% journalism nerd. I know, mildly shocking that they can determine what percentage nerd you are.

Anyway, so I still believe that George W. Bush is going to hell for being a terrible person, if there is a hell. And if not, he'll have to live his whole life battling his conscious.

Bill Brasky is a son of a b*tch.

Girls... I don't get 'em - literally and figuratively.

Oh, it's so clear now.

2005-03-21T18:19:00.000-05:00

As life marches on, it becomes increasingly more apparent to me:

It’s not Bush, it’s the system.

I would invest every drop of energy I have into making sure the Democratic candidate is elected in 2008, but it doesn’t matter. I will vote for that candidate, barring some unforeseen event, and I will work for them as well.

Until populism is at the forefront of politics, the nation will not advance into the next golden age, but instead fade into the sunset and join Babylon, Rome and the Common Wealth of Great Britain in the history books.

Speaking of being the next Babylon:
It’s good to see gay people are increasingly not allowed to marry, a sure sign that morality is returning to Amurika. As is already increasingly the case, employees in this great nation will be hired based on their activities outside of work, like political belief and personal choices. Then we’ll invade every country disagreeing with ours, on false charges, and say ‘Well, we gave them the government we think is best, so then, does it matter why we went to war?’ Oh, well I guess that’s already the case, too.

Well, God blessed the United States, but God damn those who would hoard what they have, simultaneously destroying the great natural beauty and goodness of this world and the people who have come to call it home.

I would have compromised before, but now, oh, it’s so clear. People who purposefully and knowingly make money by lowering someone else’s quality of life are going to hell.

It’s so funny to see Christianity and Bush merged so.
“Blessed are the peacemakers.” Whoops!
“The meek shall inherit the earth.” Fucked that one up too!
If you listen to these crack-pots on Christianity, this is what you’d believe:

What God really cares about is sex, drugs and rock and roll. If gay people are allowed marriage status, they might, gasp, be able to have power of attorney over their partner’s assets when that partner is incapacitated. Who knows what immoral activity could follow?

Christ talked about loving your fellow humans unconditionally, but the Religious Right Klan only tells my generation that God wants you to dress conservatively and not curse. What a sad, sad, sad, sad state of things.

Oh, but it’s all ok, because life is short but sweet for certain. The only thing that matters is being a good person, everything else is secondary.

Tax Dollars Buy Journalists

2005-01-11T21:42:00.000-05:00

January 11, 2005

Armstrong Williams: I'm Not the Only One

I had the guilty pleasure of being able to go on Fox News this weekend and join the pile-on atop Armstrong Williams. In leaping upon the scandal-struck rightwing commentator, I was accompanied by Tony Snow and Linda Chavez. But the real treat came when I encountered Williams in the green room after the show. He acknowledged he had messed up, but he told me he was not the only conservative pundit who has taken money from the Bush gang. He would not, however, reveal names. Below is how I wrote up this scooplet for my "Capital Games" column at www.thenation.com. And if you've already seen this column at that site, scroll down for a look at Williams' odd approach to job interviews.

"Armstrong Williams: I Am Not Alone" David Corn. January 10, 2004.

It was a rare moment of talk-show unanimity. On the set of the Fox News Washington bureau, host Tony Snow, fellow guest Linda Chavez (a conservative pundit), and I were slamming Armstrong Williams, a rightwing columnist and talk show host. USA Today had reported--as you probably know--that Williams had been paid nearly a quarter of a million dollars by the Bush administration to promote its No Child Left Behind education bill. And Williams, who supported the legislation in his column and as a cable news talking head, had not bothered to inform his audiences or the folks who book him at CNN, Fox, and MSNBC that he was a shill on the Bush payroll.

Snow was shaking his head at Williams' indiscretion, and Chavez was upset and joked that she had received bupkis from the White House. Prior to going on air, she had complained that ArmstrongGate had caused some people to assume that she and other conservative commentators were also riding this gravy train. Since the story broke on Friday, she said, several people had asked her how much she had received from the Bush administration. She was pissed at Williams for conduct that was raising questions about the whole cadre of rightwing pundits. During our non-debate on Williams, I noted that it was a waste of taxpayer money to pay Williams for supporting the Bush administration, which he seemed quite willing to do for free. And I wondered aloud how this contract had come to be.

After our segment finished, Chavez and I headed to the green room, and there he was: Armstrong Williams. He was waiting to go on air to defend himself. I've known him a long time; we've often sparred, in friendly fashion, on these shouting-head shows. I shook my head and said, "Armstrong, Armstrong, Armstrong...." He was quick with his main talking point: "It was bad judgment, Dave. Bad judgment." His phone rang. He answered it, said hello, and then told the person on the other end, "It was bad judgment. You know, just bad judgment." I was reminded that in addition to being a pundit, Williams, a leading African-American conservative and Clarence Thomas protege, is a PR specialist with his own firm. Not too long ago, Michael Jackson called him for advice. Now he had himself for a client, and, heeding conventional crisis-management strategy, he was practicing strict message discipline: bad judgment, bad judgment, bad judgment.

As we chatted, Chavez politely expressed her anger at Williams. This scandal, she noted, would provide ammunition to those who dismiss minority conservatives as race sellouts who have been bought off by the Republicans. (She is Mexican-American.) Williams absorbed her point, acting contrite.

I asked if Williams had yet been contacted by the inspector general at the Education Department, the agency that had awarded the contract that supplied him $241,000 for promoting the NCLB measure within the African-American community. Representative George Miller, the ranking Democrat on the education committee, and other House Democrats had already called for an investigation. Why should the IG contact me? Williams replied, noting he had been merely a subcontractor. Any thorough investigation, I remarked, would include questioning the subcontractor. He scratched his head. "Funny," he said. "I thought this [contract] was a blessing at the time."

And then Williams violated a PR rule: he got off-point. "This happens all the time," he told me. "There are others." Really? I said. Other conservative commentators accept money from the Bush administration? I asked Williams for names. "I'm not going to defend myself that way," he said. The issue right now, he explained, was his own mistake. Well, I said, what if I call you up in a few weeks, after this blows over, and then ask you? No, he said.

Does Williams really know something about other rightwing pundits? Or was he only trying to minimize his own screw-up with a momentary embrace of a trumped-up everybody-does-it defense? I could not tell. But if the IG at the Department of Education or any other official questions Williams, I suggest he or she ask what Williams meant by this comment. And if Williams is really sorry for this act of "bad judgment" and for besmirching the profession of rightwing punditry, shouldn't he do what he can to guarantee that those who watch pundits on the cable news networks and read political columnists receive conservative views that are independent and untainted by payoffs from the Bush administration or other political outfits?
Armstrong, please, help us all protect the independence of the conservative commentariat. If you are not alone, tell us who else has yielded to bad judgment

From:
http://www.davidcorn.com/

A special thanks to Concerned Citizens at http://propagate.blogspot.com/

Morgan Stanley's Chief Economist Expects Armageddon

2004-11-23T17:28:00.000-05:00

Stephen Roach, the chief economist at investment banking giant Morgan Stanley, has a public reputation for being bearish.

But you should hear what he's saying in private.

Roach met select groups of fund managers downtown last week, including a group at Fidelity.

His prediction: America has no better than a 10 percent chance of avoiding economic ``armageddon.''

In a nutshell, Roach's argument is that America's record trade deficit means the dollar will keep falling. To keep foreigners buying T-bills and prevent a resulting rise in inflation, Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan will be forced to raise interest rates further and faster than he wants.

To finance its current account deficit with the rest of the world, he said, America has to import $2.6 billion in cash. Every working day.

That is an amazing 80 percent of the entire world's net savings.

Sustainable? Hardly.

Meanwhile, he notes that household debt is at record levels.

Twenty years ago the total debt of U.S. households was equal to half the size of the economy.

Today the figure is 85 percent.

http://business.bostonherald.com/businessNews/view.bg?a...

As if National Election Fraud Wasn't Enough

2004-11-13T21:05:00.000-05:00

Bloomington Ind. - Baron Hill (D - Ind.), incumbent Representative from Indiana's ninth district has asked for a recount in the election that he has lost by just under 1500 votes. The company that sold the machines to the counties have had at least four incidents of voter fraud. In each instance Democratic straight-ticket votes were mistakenly counted as Liberatarian.

MY VOTE WAS NOT COUNTED! I HAVE BEEN FRAUDED, AND NOW I AM MAD AS HELL.

God Bless

2004-11-13T20:12:00.000-05:00

God Bless those involved in Saturday's horrific car accident. My heart and soul go out to the Rice and Woerner families in this hard time. Please, pray for Travis, the Rice family.

Laura and Nick - I know and like you both, but why? You've both got some soul searching to do and some consequences to face. Please take some lesson away from this.

Side note: if you're from Hamilton County, be careful on the roads. I've seen too many lost, hurt censured or in danger because of either driving (myself included), alcohol or both.

Story

Europe pulling out of Iraq in a hurry

2004-11-13T14:58:00.000-05:00

The Netherlands will pull out its troops from Iraq on March 15, sticking with a decision first made in June.

Dutch news agency ANP cited Defense Minister Henk Kamp on Friday as saying that the country's 1,350-contingent will leave the US-led multinational contingent.

The Netherlands first sent troops to Iraq in August 2003 and won parliamentary approval this summer to extend their stay until March 2005.

Iraq's interim administration wants to hold elections in January despite mounting violence, and the Netherlands has come under increasing US and British pressure to keep its troops there after March.

Just one more country out of the coalition of the unwilling. Besides the Divided States of Theocracy, Poland and the UK, who's left?

Ten Reasons not to date a Bush-voter

2004-11-13T14:54:00.000-05:00

1. "Just a few more billion dollars ..." The dating translation is "Just another 20," "Just another 10," "Just another 50 to get me through the week," and if you say no somehow you end up being the bad guy. You'll end up at McDonald's for your birthday, hot tears of rage falling into your McFlurry.

2. So, you're dating someone who thinks abstinence-only sex education, a.k.a. sexual ignorance, is a great idea. Awesome! That itch you have is crabs.

3. Look at the War on Iraq. Following that logic, a Bush voter will potentially get you in bed a) without preparation, b) under false pretenses and c) you weren't really even the one he wanted, but he couldn't find her.

4. "I outsourced my orgasms to the personal trainer down the hall. He works faster and doesn't want as much in return as my boyfriend does. I think it's good for our relationship." Uh-huh.

5. You need someone who worries about YOUR second coming and no one else's.

6. He's into dress-up: On the aircraft carrier. As a cowboy. As a cheerleader. People who fall for this are into home-theater and role-playing. If you find yourself in a game of "Spaceman Wang Conquers Planet Naked," don't come crying to me.

7. The Bush voter's affair with ignorance extends from sex (see number two) to science, as their guy favors limiting stem cell research, thus limiting hope for so many cures to so many awful illnesses. Since they like to be in the dark, never enlighten them as to your phone number. In fact, do like California and give them the finger.

8. Your honey is in favor of curtailing people's rights because they're gay; for example, the right to marry. It won't help to point out that marriage is only made sacred by the couple themselves. Maybe your Bush-loving partner would prefer a mail-order bride.

9. So your sweetie is itching to reverse Roe v. Wade? A control freak in the courtroom is a control freak everywhere. Screw these people, but never, ever literally. What if the condom breaks?

10. If they admire the ability to turn a surplus into a deficit, don't give them your PIN code, dont listen when they say "Oh, I won't order one, I'll just have some of yours," and if, despite all I've told you, you insist on having sex, don't ever let them finish first. You'll never get yours back.

(Alternet.org)

Lessons from Cicero

2004-11-09T19:31:00.000-05:00

Government must not be allowed to devolve to a fight over people's passions fueled by two self-perpetuating sides.

Written 1900 years ago... funny how things never change...

(Y381)

Voter Fraud, Kerry needs to unconceed

2004-11-09T13:21:00.000-05:00

From Jordan:

Here's something to chew on, not evidence of fraud but interesting claims and important to understand.

Some evidence that will make the case

And then A list of stories demonstrating the fraud

"Red States, you lose." Blue States

2004-11-07T23:34:00.000-05:00

With hard work and superb organization, you have triumphed over John Kerry and the forces of Blue-state paternalism. Congratulations. The multinational corporations that hold you in bondage remain free to profit off your sweat nearly tax free, while their overpaid senior execs continue to pay a pittance in personal income tax.
Your primary and secondary schools will continue to turn out third-rate pupils with limited opportunities, while you enjoy the satisfaction of making it on your own without health care when a catastrophic illness bankrupts your family.

Your agricultural universities will continue issuing Ph.D.s in football, and bogus Protestant Evangelical and Fundamentalist theology, and how to jerk off a bull safely.

You can continue sending your sons to die in Iraq on a fool's errand. When you bury them, you can console yourselves with Bush's platitudes about their heroic mission to defend America from weapons of mass destruction.

You can savor the deficit spending that stimulates commerce today, but will cripple the US economy in ten or fifteen years' time when the bills come due with interest. Perhaps a Democrat will be in office at that time, who can be blamed for W's delayed economic fiasco.

You can continue believing that we, your neighbors, are your enemies. You can believe that we have no morals; that we pimp out our teenage daughters for Internet porn; that we eat babies; that we are all gay; that we are cowards on the battlefield; and that we want to run your lives and give you AIDS.

On 2 November, you thanked us by electing a shrewd, manipulative handmaiden to corporate America who panders to you while ruthlessly exploiting your ignorance and weakness for the benefit of his patrons in the national plutocracy. There is nothing we can do about that. You won fair and square.

We should let you rot. We should secede and leave you to fend for yourselves. Then you will see firsthand just how dependent you are. We are sick of fighting for you by fighting against you. Perhaps, when you see how dreary your lives have become without us, you will finally develop the spine to fight for your basic, human rights. And then we will gladly confront the plutocracy alongside you. We need your help to defeat the Blue Republicans, who, I assure you, are just as decadent as we are, though often richer.

We'll gladly get your backs. But first you must grow the brains and the balls needed to profit from our help.

These could be final days of a nation united

2004-11-05T16:17:00.000-05:00

Maybe this is where America ends.

A reader raised that notion in an e-mail to me even before this week's election. Dismayed at the fractures and fissures exposed by an acrimonious presidential campaign and despairing of ever putting this Humpty Dumpty together again, he advanced a radical thesis.

We are, he pointed out, a nation founded not on common ancestry but rather, shared ideals: liberty and justice for all. Maybe, he said, that sort of bond ultimately cannot hold. It would be no surprise to him, he wrote, to see the U.S. split into two or more separate countries in his lifetime. He is 32.

I intend no endorsement of his prediction when I say that it struck me hard -- mainly because I could not airily dismiss it. Could not say with certainty that it will not happen.

If and when it does, some observers will be primed to blame so-called hyphenated Americanism. But it seems apparent after this week that the fissure that divides us most dramatically is less about race or ethnicity than something larger: culture, an unresolved clash of worldviews, mores and norms. It's the morality, stupid.

Indeed, CNN reports that more exit poll respondents called that the most important issue of the election than cited Iraq, the economy or terrorism. Morality is, of course, a code word for antipathy toward gay rights and abortion. Those who shared that antipathy voted overwhelmingly for President Bush.

To say I am merely depressed that he was reelected is to say the Titanic sustained a little paint damage. I speak not from any particular affinity for John Kerry but, rather, from a conviction that Bush's peculiar combination of faith-based zealotry and utter incompetence constitute a clear and present danger to national security and international stability.

After his reelection, someone sent me a note. Maybe now you'll understand, he crowed, that you don't represent America. This, based on a victory margin of 3 percent.

The president has issued honeyed words about reaching across ideological lines in the name of national unity. But given that he followed his last election -- an even narrower victory -- by turning to the right on two wheels, it seems a safe bet that he'll take from this victory the same moral as my correspondent. He'll think he's found himself a mandate.

Small wonder that everywhere I go, people are talking about moving to Canada. That's the kind of joke you make when you no longer recognize your country.

That disconnect is not about liberalism vs. conservatism. Agree with them or disagree -- I've done both -- there is a certain pragmatism to traditional conservatives. You know where they're coming from: small government; personal responsibility; fiscal restraint. And their arguments are usually grounded in something recognizable as logic.

But social conservatism is another thing entirely, a mutant strain unhindered by critical thought. These are the nominal Christians whose Bibles are so long on judgment yet so short on compassion, the soldiers of the new American theocracy who want to force creation ''science'' on the schools and deportation on the Muslims. They are the super patriots who regard criticism as treason, the pious moralizers who believe single mothers should be barred from teaching in public schools. They are blind guides who see tens of thousands dying in Iraq and think the defining issue of the election is what gay men do in bed. They give God a bad name.

And their chosen leader is about to embark on his second term as president of the United States.

One nation splitting in two? I hope my reader is wrong.

But if he is not, Tuesday will loom large in history to those seeking to understand why. They'll call it the day the end began.

http://www.miami.com/mld/miamiherald/living/columnists/leonard_pitts/10103571.htm

Coalition nearly gone

2004-11-04T20:28:00.000-05:00

From the Associated Press:

In a blow to U.S. efforts to keep countries from deserting the multinational force, Hungary said this week it won't keep troops there beyond March 31. The Czechs plan to pull out by the end of February, the Dutch soon afterward. And Japan is feeling pressure to withdraw.

Bulgaria said this week it may "slightly reduce" its contingent of 480 infantry soldiers next year. The Netherlands said its 1,400 troops will finish their mission in March.

Voting day MUST be a national holiday

2004-11-04T20:17:00.000-05:00

Hundreds of thousands of people were disenfranchised in Ohio. People waited on line for as long as 10 hours. It appears to have only happened in Democratic-leaning precincts, principally (a) precincts where many African Americans lived, and (b) precincts near colleges.

I spoke to a young man who got on line at 11:30 am and voted at 7 pm. When he left at 7 pm, the line was about 150 voters longer than when he'd arrived, which meant those people were going to wait even longer. In fact they waited for as much as 10 hours, and their voting was concluded at about 3 am. The reason this occurred was that they had 1 voting station per 1000 voters, while the adjacent precinct had 1 voting station per 184. Both precincts were within the same county, and managed by the same county board of elections. The difference between them is that the privileged polling place was in a rural, solidly republican, area, while the one with long lines was in the college town of Gambier, OH.

Lines of 4 and 5 hours were the order of the day in many African-American neighborhoods.
Touch screen voting machines in Youngstown OH were registering "George W. Bush" when people pressed "John F. Kerry" ALL DAY LONG. This was reported immediately after the polls opened, and reported over and over again throughout the day, and yet the bogus machines were inexplicably kept in use THROUGHOUT THE DAY.

Countless other frauds occurred, such as postcards advising people of incorrect polling places, registered Democrats not receiving absentee ballots, duly registered young voters being forced to file provisional ballots even though their names and signatures appeared in the voting rolls, longtime active voting registered voters being told they weren't registered, bad faith challenges by Republican "challengers" in Democratic precincts, and on and on and on.

I was very proud of the way so many Ohioans fought so valiantly for their right to vote, and would not be turned away. Many, however, could not spend the entire day and were afraid of losing their jobs, due to the severe economic depression hitting Ohio.

dailykos.com

First Plank of the New Platform.

2004-11-04T20:14:00.000-05:00

Separation of Religion and State Amendment to the Constitution.

You do not truly have the freedom to practice your religious beliefs if you are also required to adhere to any of the religious beliefs or rules of others. What freedom from religion does mean, however, is the freedom from the rules and dogmas of other people's religious beliefs so that we can be free to follow the demands of our own conscience, whether they take a religious form or not.

"Magistrates [officials of the civil government] have no power of setting up the form of Church Government, electing Church officers, punishing with Church censures, but to see that the Church does her duty herein. ...And on the other side, the Churches as Churches, (though as members of the Commonwealth they may have power) have no power of erecting or altering forms of civil government, electing of civil officers, inflicting Civil punishments (no not on persons excommunicated) as by deposing Magistrates from their Civil Authority, or withdrawing the hearts of the people against them, to their laws, no more than to discharge wives, or children, or servants, from due obedience to their husbands, parents, or masters; or by taking up arms against their Magistrates, though he persecute them for conscience." (Roger Williams, Bloudy Tenent of Persecution for Cause of Conscience (1644), page 248-249).

Thank you to Jordan for the information.

There's no crying in politics.

2004-11-04T20:10:00.000-05:00

The failures of the Democratic Party in 2004 are nothing more than learning tools. While the country will suffer under the next four years, there is a way in which both parties can remain happy while championing the will of the people.

Will the politicians listen? It's unlikely, but, my friends, we have a dream. We have a dream that one day Separation of Church and State will be realized. That one day America will not be leading civilized nations in terms of childern under the poverty line. That Blacks and Women will make the same as the white man. That corporations will not have the same privileges as you and I while encountering few of the responsibilities. The list marches on…

We find ourselves decades removed from Dr. King’s speech, yet we share many of the problems his generation encountered. Voting in America is still essentially a joke due to an archaic electoral college. Social Security is on the brink, inevitably bankrupting the already bankrupt. America still has no viable plan for its energy problems. The environment is still defaced and raped everyday, home and abroad. We have the nation’s all-time highest deficit. College tuition is absurd, aid money is increasingly cut. Education is about testing, not about learning. Minimum wage is so far behind that living of the minimum wage would starve most Americans in typical living conditions. Unemployment is on the rise. You get the picture…

But we are not here to simply complain my friends! There is a plan; there is action to be taken. Join us in the fight for the people, and through the Democratic Party, equality of opportunity can be achieved.

www.hoosiersforchange.org

The Jordan-Sam Platform

2004-11-03T23:12:00.000-05:00

There is still hope for the world, if some crucial steps are taken. Here's what we are proposing:

Add a ‘Separation of Church and State’ amendment to the Constitution

Corporations must no longer be allowed to contribute to campaigns, 527's and political parties.

Create a mathematical formula based on current economic realities (GNP, debt, inflation) that caps national spending at a point which will reduce the debt each year, inevitably balancing the budget.

Eliminate riders on bills that don't relate to that bill, forcing Congress and the President to vote and veto on issues, not politicking.

Voting Reform: Instant Runoff Voting is necessary

Minimum Wage Hike: There must be a Living Wage.

No privatization for Social Security

Place time limits on corporate subsidies

Allow anyone who would take it an option to reject Social Security

The Future of Energy: Technological advancements in alternative energy that benefit American citizens as well as create new jobs in America.

Email: scnissen@indiana.edu to help.

1 in 4 soldiers die because of lack of body armor

2004-11-03T23:09:00.000-05:00

United Press International

WASHINGTON - Twenty percent of the U.S. troops killed in Iraq might have lived had there been more armored, heavier vehicles available to them, Newsweek reports Monday.

Newsweek reports that an unofficial study by a defense consultant now circulating through the Army says 142 Americans were killed by land mines or improvised roadside bombs and 48 others by rocket-propelled grenades.

"Almost all those soldiers were killed while in unprotected vehicles, which means that perhaps one in four of those killed in combat in Iraq might be alive if they had had stronger armor around them," according to Newsweek's account.

Hungary to withdraw troops

2004-11-03T23:04:00.000-05:00

The Associated Press
Wednesday, November 3, 2004;

BUDAPEST, Hungary - Hungary will withdraw its 300 non-combat troops from Iraq by March 31, the country's new prime minister said Wednesday, contending that staying longer would be an "impossibility."

So much for the coalition...

Say goodbye to reason, and Colin Powell

2004-11-03T22:47:00.000-05:00

Secretary Of State Colin Powell has been a good soldier in public, even as he has had to fight for every small victory against Administration hawks like Vice President Dick Cheney and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld. But he has privately grown more frustrated, and now, sources close to Powell tell Time, he has a firm plan for his exit: he will step down at the end of President Bush's current term. "He will have done a yeoman's job of contributing over the four years," says a close aide. "But that's enough." The aide says Powell's view of the matter is, "I did what my heart told me to do. I got [Bush] here and set him up. I did the best I could do."

(CNN)

I will be spending the next few weeks proving that America is going to hell in a handbasket - it will not be hard.

DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE REPUBLICAN

2004-10-14T16:40:00.000-05:00

Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.

With his first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is moderately clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for laws to inhibit industries from polluting our air.

He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.

Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FDIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at> his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.

Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have. It 1s survival of the fittest and my life is good because I worked and made it that way.

Kerry breaks debate rules, Bush breaks international law, America's trust.

2004-10-14T10:53:00.000-05:00

An exerpt from a story I wrote:

The debate intensified when Kerry was asked if the Bush Administration was entirely to blame for the job loss.
After Kerry’s answer, Bush chose to rebut the Kerry’s previous statement first – not uncommon for either candidate in the three debates.
“Whew! Let me start with the Pell grants,” Bush said. “In his last litany of misstatements he said we cut Pell grants. We've increased Pell grants by a million students. That's a fact.”
Kerry pointed out that the Pell grants are not at the levels the president promised, but failed to make use of the fact that the Pell program is already underfunded by $2.5 billion according to Congressional Quarterly.
More fire power was available to the Senator. The cost of going to college has exceeded inflation for the last 28 years, yet Pell Grants have risen slower than inflation according to the National Association for College Admission Counseling.
Another intense moment of the debate came when Bush was asked about choosing Supreme Court Justices.
After Bush’s concise answer, Kerry responded and then used his 90 seconds to address the topic of education, widely considered the Bush Administration’s chief domestic issue.
“And yet the president who talks about No Child Left Behind,” Kerry said, “refused to fully fund by $28 billion that particular program so you can make a difference in the lives of those young people.”
A disgruntled Bush then called Kerry “a liberal senator from Massachusetts,” one of the many times President Bush attempted to connect the stereotypical image of a wealthy east-coast liberal to Senator Kerry Wednesday night.
Bush rebutted Kerry’s comment noting that, as President, he had increased education funding by 49% and emphatically stating that America must educate its children.
Kerry, in violation of the agreed-upon debate rules, directly addressed the President to begin his response.
“You don't measure it by a percentage increase, Mr. President,” Kerry said. “You measure it by whether you're getting the job done. Five hundred thousand kids lost after-school programs because of your budget.”

The History of GWB in brief.

2004-09-21T16:07:00.000-05:00

Declining wages, lost jobs and rising living expences - I bet you didn't know we live in a third world country.

He will be the first president since Herbert Hoover and the Great Depression to oversee a decline in employment in a single term. Despite huge tax breaks to the rich and large corporations, our country has lost jobs under his reign. Equally important, the jobs being created pay substantially less than those lost. Incredibly, because of outsourcing and disastrous trade policies with China and other countries, in the last three years alone we have lost 2.7 million good-paying manufacturing jobs—16 percent of that sector. We are now on the verge of losing millions of high-tech jobs to India and elsewhere. In the midst of all of this, Bush and Co. support outsourcing and the anti-American actions of their corporate allies.

While corporate America throws American workers out on the street and move their jobs abroad, wages are no longer keeping up with inflation. They fell 1.1 percent in June—the steepest decline in real hourly wages since 1991. In fact, real hourly wages declined in five of the six previous months. Because the middle class is shrinking, the average American employee is working the longest hours in the industrialized world—and 62 percent say their workload has increased over the last six months, a situation about to worsen because of new Bush rules that cut overtime pay for 6 million employees. Poverty also increased by 1.3 million in the last year alone; hunger and homelessness are on the rise.

Yet, the wealthiest people have never had it so good. The gap between the rich and the poor is now wider than at any time since the 1920s, with the richest 1 percent owning more wealth than the bottom 90 percent. Corporate profits are soaring, and compensation of CEOs of our largest corporations is 500 times greater than their workers.

The United States also remains the only major country that does not guarantee healthcare for all its citizens, and this situation only worsened in the last four years. Five million more Americans lost their health insurance since Bush took office, and today we have a record 45 million without any coverage. As health insurance premiums soar, workers are being asked to contribute more in premiums, deductibles and co-payments. Meanwhile, the administration attempts to privatize Medicare and, just last week, announced the largest premium increase in the Medicare program’s history, raising the monthly expense by $11.60 to $78.20. While the cost of prescription drugs soars Bush has defended the pharmaceutical industry, which heavily funded his campaign, by trying to stop all efforts to end the national disgrace of Americans paying, by far, the highest prices in the world for their medicine.

President Bush and the Republican leadership have provided hundreds of billions in tax breaks to the richest 1 percent, people with an average income of more than $1 million a year. And in the process have created record-breaking deficits and a $7 trillion national debt—spurring Alan Greenspan and other financial leaders to advocate cuts in Social Security benefits. In fact, all programs that benefit the middle class are now at risk.

Bush has thrown 160,000 veterans off VA healthcare, and his new Veterans budget will substantially raise fees for the men and women who have put their lives on the line defending our nation. In the midst of a major crisis in affordable housing, the president also wants to decimate the Section 8 program.
(Inthesetimes.com)